Confessions of a Hands-On Groom

Three days to go.

You'd think that by now, I'd start to get cold feet. On the contrary, I'm actually excited about our wedding.

Although Janice and I started preparing for our wedding day a little over 11 months ago, my own personal preparations have begun much earlier than that Sunday morning in Tagaytay. Around two months before I popped the question, I have studied the ins and outs of buying an engagement ring. Add to this the "buwelo" I had to gather before I started to make my move, I'd say I have been preparing myself for almost 2 years now.

I will never be able to recall a defining moment in our relationship when I was finally sure that Janice would be the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. It was not a divine sign, nor a dramatic moment, nor a magical night underneath the stars, that led me to this conviction. In between the fears, the tears, the uncontrollable laughter we've shared, it just grew, and I knew, that our happy beginning is not a question of "if" but merely a question of when. As we nurtured our relationship, I was starting to pack my bags, preparing to take the train to marital bliss.

Preparing for a wedding is an adventure. Primarily because it is always your first time, and you will never be ready for it. You simply jump into the darkness, and learn along the way.

Weddings have traditionally been the bride's kind of thing. But having known a couple of male friends who themselves got their hands dirty with the bridal DIY glue, I was somehow encouraged that there is nothing wrong with me for being excited with all of these. I am proud to say that I am a hands-on groom. I was the one who found my bride's make-up artist, discussed the design of our unity candles with our online vendor, surfed the net for the perfect venue for our prenuptial pictorials, and a lot more, to the point that Janice claims I have done 90% of the work.

Sure, wedding preparations are fun. But the truth is, your wedding can only be as good as the effort you put into it. The truth is, there are elements you have to let go of, ideas that will never work out the way they were conjured in your head. The truth is, two people in love will disappoint and frustrate each other, either through miscommunication or negligence. The truth is, things will never work out perfectly the way they were planned. Preparing for a wedding is a roller coaster ride. It goes ups, comes down, it goes too fast then stalls; it takes a lot of fortitude and faith to keep the wheels rolling towards that envisioned destination.

It is during the homestretch that we discovered the value of Faith in our relationship. Barely 2 weeks into the wedding day, I found myself consoling my bride who was crying over her less than perfect wedding gown. I found myself trying to reassure her that things will be okay, as long as we have faith in Him and firmly believe that He is watching over us. A week into the wedding day, I found myself, with my faith dangerously wavering, trying to convince myself that all these things are trials from God, and that we should, as the Bible puts it, be joyful for them. Last Sunday, God once again manifested his Love for us, and turned things around. Janice now can't wait to march down the aisle with a wedding gown she loves.

Preparing for our wedding has been a long and exciting adventure for both of us. In our desire to make our dream wedding turn into reality, reality joined the fray and helped us grow together. Fate interfered and multiplied our faith a thousand fold. In preparing for our wedding together, we have now prepared ourselves for our marriage.